Outline Scripts - Feedback

I have showed a couple of my target audience my outline scripts for the first few scenes of my trailer and I have gathered their feedback for it in order to improve it or make changes. I asked my audience what they liked about the scripts and what I should change and here is what they said:

What I liked

• The dialogue sets the scene very quickly for audiences to understand, especially the first line which immediately introduces a plot point of the film "It's been 5 months since my brother died in a car accident".
• The dialogue sounds authentic because the characters are just regular teenagers venting about their problems which is what most teens do, including myself. So I like the realistic aspect of the scripts and I feel like some people will relate to the characters.
• I like the scene where one of the characters become angry because it shows that there will be some drama within the film and I like dramatic story lines. The script looks very good and I think I would enjoy the film just by reading it.

What should be improved

• Perhaps the script could be just a little bit shorter since it is only for the trailer and will not include the full scene, apart from that keep the dialogue because it's good.
• One of the scenes included a swear word. Maybe don't include the swear word in the trailer because it may not appeal to some audiences.
• Add some more scenes where the characters deal with their problems.

Conclusion

To conclude, I gained both positive and negative feedback from my outline scripts which I can now use to improve my trailer. I will do the changes that my audience have suggested because this will improve my trailer. I will also continue to write more scenes for the trailer.